CLARIFICATION

How is it possible that the members of the Order knew that my friend had broken the veil of secrecy that protected them? And how is it possible that they appeared exactly at that moment?

One can ask oneself how these coincidences, these strange coincidences can have taken place. I cannot answer how it is that certain things that appear incredible are possible. All I can do is recount what I have lived through -some things I have seen, some I have only heard-, and in that sense I must say that as far as I remember it was always like that. Events surrounding my friend were like that. As if his destiny was to face particular situations and those situations inevitably found him, appearing from nowhere for no apparent reason. Inevitably these situations had to have an outcome, they had to be overcome or they would be a burden and my friend would never become what he was expected to be.

DEMIAN

That morning we had agreed to have breakfast at a bar. He arrived overjoyed. Very happy. He was always like that, though that time his appearance reflected the fact that something special was happening. He was sorry but he could not stay. I was going to protest that it was a last-minute change but his girlfriend was waiting for him and I kept silent. I was aware that for him, that level of happiness could not be compared with anything else and there was nothing to negotiate.

Before leaving, he asked me if I wanted to know who he was. I said yes. Smiling, he showed me a book: Demian by Herman Hesse. "This is me," he said a little more seriously, "Read it carefully," he insisted. He marched off as energetically as he had arrived.

The book was still on the table. I could still see my friend in the distance and I felt the sensation of having had an encounter with a stroke of lightning, a force of nature. Everything around him appeared to shine. "It must be happiness," I said to myself.

The book stayed on the table for several minutes more. I did not dare to open it. What would I find in it? Finally I opened it and read it with great interest, most of all the section in which Sinclair describes Max Demian. There was no doubt there was something of my friend in all that, though, in a certain way, the affection that I felt for him stopped me seeing him in that way.

Some of the questions that Hesse puts in Demian's mouth appeared to me to be a little strange. They did not sit well with me but I did not treat them as less important because of that. At least I did not believe that I did, though it did contain too many enigmas for it not to be put aside occasionally for a period of time, thus allowing what I had read to influence me.

As I say, I put aside what I did not understand and I focused on the other questions that were more familiar to me. From that day onwards, as if it were the most natural thing in the world, I started to call him Demian, happy at having found a name that reflected the inner truth of my friend, what he really was.

THE EVOLUTION OF DEMIAN

The teaching, the education of Demian was of tremendous importance. There was nothing that I could know about its interior processes that remained hidden from my gaze, but I am very sure of having participated in these processes as far as the exterior effects are concerned. Regarding this I had the impression, and I still have it as a memory, that every day Demian appeared to have learned something new or, at least, grown.

During the earlier part of those approximately nine months that we were together, many of Demian's experiences came through Jimmy. Later on, he appeared to acquire experiences and knowledge through his own efforts and Jimmy appeared at a second level, as if waiting for my friend to find things out for himself before appearing. There was an evolution that was more than evident in Demian of which, as I said, I can only recount some of its effects.